"Latin Americans F*** up Countries."

I got to thinking last night in the Irish-themed novelty pub, as John (the venezuelan film student) explained to me the various offenses committed by a number of countries around the world. The more I understood his qualms, the more I thought that the US might actually be a decent remedy for his troubles. He said he had visited Orlando, a small town in Massachusetts, and NYC, and well, didn't really like the US either. It dawned on me how little of the country's culture he had actually seen, even with that amount of visits. 

We began to compare world regions and cultures from the small lenses from which we'd both seem them, and I got some chuckle-worthy insight into Latin Americans' perceptions of their brothers up north.

It should be remembered that the greatest exposure a lot of the world has to America is through our media--Hollywood movies and Pop music, primarily. And since reality TV is, you know, real people, turns out Venezuelans think most American girls act like the girls they see on MTV's The Hills. Evidently, even Venezuelan girls have put on the, like, valley speech, or whatever.

I was about to put John in his place about the difference between what you'll see on TV and what Americans are really like, and it dawned on me...half the girls at my school could be characters on the Hills. And actually probably want to be! 

That got me wondering how accurate a portrayal of the US Hollywood actually provides.

I saw the movie Watchmen here in Buenos Aires. That movie has a lot of US cultural history in it, as it takes place in the 60s and 70s. As the history progresses, musical styles change and culture references are dispersed throughout the movie. One line that stood out to me was after one of the superheros was created, the scientist says on the black and white TV screen: "There is a God, and he's American."

Reading those words as spanish subtitles on the huge screen made me blush. To many of us, that would be a joke. We are not as patriotic (nationalistic) as a country as we've been in the past, so the line felt sort of cheesy and nostalgic. And while I bet many Americans probably wouldn't even get that as irony, I doubt a single Argentino in the theater did. They probably rolled their eyes...yanquis. While most Americans aren't going to make a statement like that in earnest, there are definitely self-righteous Americans who WOULD say something like that...

So if the Hills accurately represents my demographic in the US, am I simply an outlier trying to deny American culture?

John continued to talk to me about how annoying it seems like most American girls are. Oddly, he'd met three girls, including me, from Boulder and they were the only Americans whose company he enjoyed. (such an oasis, this Boulder...). I wanted to refute this stereotype, and as the calculated words were about to come from my mouth, about 3 or 4 female American tourists sat down at the other end of the table and started yammering away like absolute idiots. They were really obnoxious. John made the motion of a backhand in their direction and I laughed. So much for my retort.  

I was starting to feel a little defeated with the boo-America talk, when all of a sudden John says, "I heard the population of Latinos in the US is increasing a lot. Maybe only a 10 years and there will be a Latino president."

I nodded with a smile, there is a huge increase in the Latino population--hooray for American diversity!!

Which is when he drops this bomb:

"That's too bad, Latin Americans f*** up countries." 

I almost spit out my bar peanuts. 

"Excuse me??" 

"It's our culture," He explained, "Latinos ruined Miami. They don't understand that hanging laundry from balconies is ugly. No Latinos understand that nobody wants to see their underwear." He motioned to two Argentine men peeing behind a tree right next to the bar in the upscale neighborhood we were in. "See? look at that. That will be your country." 

John doesn't realize we already have a lot of irresponsible men pissing all over our country. I doubt some latin spices are going to do any more damage. But, it was interesting to hear that culture-hating isn't limited to south-north. There's plenty of self-deprecating citizens of the world as well. 

Maybe universal intolerance will be the new playing field. We can all be hated equally? Even by our own brethren?

I don't know...

I have no conclusion. I just hope all the F***ed-up Latin American countries get it together so we don't have to talk about it like that anymore....